Hallelujahs
by teirrah
Summary: Song parodies, mostly to the tune of Hallelujah by Rufus Wainwright, but some are of songs such as 'Be a Man' from Disney's Mulan. They are based on characters in the books and films: The Lord of the Rings. I wrote them with my friend Tia.
1. Various: Minis

Ringwraiths (Flintstones)

Ringwraiths, meet the Ringwraiths,

They're the meanest guys in history,

From the land of Mordor,

They're about to peek under a tree.

Chase you through the shire and to Bree,

Through the Ford where they will lose their steeds.

Ringwraiths, meet the Ringwraiths,

They're the meanest guys in histor-

The meanest guys in histor-

They're the meanest guys in HISTOREEE!!

The Ent Chant

Who are we? Me, You, I.

Our branches reach up to the sky.

Through ages long and forests far,

We rest now where the Entlings are.

Who are we? Me, You, I.

We never stall, we never lie,

So when you ask us who we are,

We are the Ents of Isengard.

Fangorn Forest (Country Gardens)

Fangorn Forest is our home

In the Rohan land of Middle Earth.

We live there and solemnly swear to destroy

The land of Isengard.

We are the tree herders.

The orcs they commit murders

So we squash them if we can.

Fangorn Forest is our home

In the Rohan land of Middle Earth.

Rule Britannia (Rule Britannia)

Fangorn Forest, is full of trees,

But it looks dead to all who see.

For Ents, we sleep, for very long

And never wake 'till we hear the song OF!

Fangorn Forest, land of the trees

Reaching to the sky all covered with leaves.

Fangorn Forest, where Entlings live,

But soon they will become tree-ish.

God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen (God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen)

Before the time of Saruman we were very happy,

He arrived and filled the land with misery and greed.

For now we hate the white wizard who roams our woods freely,

Come Ents let us go to war, go to war.

Come all Ents let us go to war.

Hobbit Song

Come all the Ents all the Sycamore and Beech,

Willow and Chestnut, for we must beseech,

Saruman the traitor: the liar and the thief,

He has gone too far and caused us too much grief.

Mount Doom (Oranges and Lemons)

I am Mount Doom, be frightened of me.

The ring was forged here, where no one could see.

I am Charadras, with snow and ice.

My avalanches, to kill will suffice.

I am Lothlorien, the home of the elves, 

For they are the people who think for themselves.

Ring-a-Ring Of Roses (Ring-a-Ring Of Roses)

Ring-a-ring or power, and everyone will cower.

Sauron, Sauron, will rule us all


	2. Sk8er Boi: Sk8er Orc

Sk8ter Orc (Sk8ter Boi)

He was an orc she was an Ent

Can I make it anymore dubious?

She stamped on him, and he ran away,

What more can I say?

He wanted blood she wanted death,

But he was her only company

When he first entered there,

The Ents tried to kill him but she saved his life.

He was a skater orc, she said 'see ya later orc',

He wasn't fair enough for her.

She was over 20 feet,

And needed a lot to eat,

All he could give her was a bow.

5 years from now, she sits at home,

Feeding the Entling she's all alone,

She goes in her yard, guess who she sees:

Sk8ter orc burning up Isengard.

She calls up her friends, they already know,

And they're on their way to destroy the show.

She tags along, stands in the crows,

Looks down at the orc that ran around.

He was a skater orc, she said 'see ya later orc',

He wasn't fair enough for her.

Now he's a chieftain orc, doing some evil work,

Trying to massacre the earth.

Sorry orc but you missed out,

Well tough luck Orthanc's ours now.

We will kill all of your kind 

And you're just a waste of time.

Too bad that you couldn't see,

See the good that is in me,

There is more than meets the eye,

You didn't look that deep inside.

He's just an Ent, and I am his wife,

Can I make it any more obvious?

We are in love, haven't you heard,

How we rock each other's world…

He was a skater orc, I said 'see ya later orc'

You're gonna die and go to hell.

Treebeard my love his here, with his great mossy beard,

You'll never compare to him now.

He was a skater orc, I said 'see ya later orc'

You're gonna die and go to hell.

Treebeard my love his here, with his great mossy beard,

You'll never compare to him now.


	3. Be a Man: Kill the Orcs

Kill the Orcs (Be a Man)

Aragorn: Let's get down to business,

To defeat Sauron.

Work a little harder

Then we'll be champions!

A Fellowship: that's what we are,

And we will never give in.

Somehow we will destroy the ring.

Through the land of Rohan,

Over hill and dale,

We will journey onwards,

Without weed or ale!

We're the toughest bunch they'll ever meet,

Even though we may be thin.

So we'll go, and destroy the ring!

Gimli: I'm never gonna catch my breath.

Sam: Say goodbye to Gaffer Gamgee.

Boromir: Things were never this hard in Minas Tirith.

Legolas: The Orcs'll be scared to death!

Pippin: Hope that we will have some mushrooms.

Merry: Pippin I think mushrooms are off the menu!

__

All: Kill the Orcs

Aragorn: We must be swift as the soaring eagle,

All: Kill the Orcs

Aragorn: With all the stealth of a bat at night.

All: Kill the Orcs

Aragorn: With all the hope of the Elven kind,

If we try our best then we can win this fight!

Time is racing towards us,

Till we reach Mordor.

Wade through murky marshes,

Where I've not been before!

I can feel that now the rage of war

Is drawing closer in, and in.

He must go, to destroy the ring!

All: Kill the Orcs

Aragorn: We must be swift as the soaring eagle,

All: Kill the Orcs

Aragorn: With all the stealth of a bat at night.

All: Kill the Orcs

Aragorn: With all the hope of the Elven kind,

If we try our best then we can win this fight!

All: Kill the Orcs

Aragorn: We must be swift as the soaring eagle,

All: Kill the Orcs

Aragorn: With all the stealth of a bat at night.

All: Kill the Orcs

Aragorn: With all the hope of the Elven kind,

If we try our best then we can win this fight!


	4. Hallelujah: Aragorn's Song

Aragorn; Death of Mordor (Hallelujah)

I heard there was a secret sword,

That Isildur used and it slew the lord,

But you don't really care for battles, do you?

It goes like this a swish, a swash,

The dark lord fell as his minions watched,

And through the blood we saw the death of Mordor.

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

My heart is strong but I need some proof,

That the love I bear is not uncouth,

For beauty and for freedom, I must do this.

I tied myself to this quest,

I must go on to defeat the rest,

And if we sty we can bring the death or Mordor.

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

Elendil I've been here before,

I know the price, I've seen the score,

I've never felt alone since I found you.

I've seen the pain he has to bear

I won't give in until we're there.

'Cause the only hope lies in the death of Mordor.

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

And tell me there's a point in love,

A symbol like a peaceful dove,

Another feeling mixing with the starlight.

It's not a way we can fight the dark,

There's not a way without leaving a mark.

'Cause the only hope lies in the death of Mordor.

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

The sword I bear I must use once more,

And then it will break as was before.

But good will come of this, I can feel it.

And when I'm sitting on my throne,

I will never be alone:

My queen will help me bring the death of Mordor.

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor

Death of Mordor Death of Mordor


	5. Hallelujah: Legolas' Song

Legolas; In the Shadows (Hallelujah)

I knew there was a secret spell,

To drive the love from Rivendell,

But no one ever though this would be true.

It goes like this; 'Amon Iel, Mornië, Nimrodel'

Then coldness will be woken in the shadows.

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

I've been told it's dead but there is no proof

That whispered words escape no tooth, 

But the moonlight is telling me to believe.

I tried to feel, I really did,

But in the end there was a bid,

Between the evils living in the shadows.

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

Maybe it's been here before,

Living like a silent gore,

Maybe it has been here since the dawning.

The elven king's forbidden task,

Did they fail? I dare not ask,

For my soul is being drawn into the shadows.

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

There was a time when all would grow,

Like nature at a beauty show,

But now all I can see is a dead world.

I remember when I heard those words,

They flew as high as the highest birds,

And innocence just melted into shadow.

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

Maybe there's a counter verse,

Or will trying just make it worse,

Why won't the answer lay itself before me?

Is there a way? Can it be done?

Will I fail before I've begun?

Or can I push away the baneful shadows?

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows

In the ShadowsIn the Shadows.


	6. Hallelujah: Boromir's Song

Boromir; Minas Tirith (Hallelujah)

I know there is a King somewhere

Roaming the earth from here to there

Who rightfully owns, and belongs in Gondor.

But he's not here, I'm in his place

As captain 'till he fills the space

And rules all of Gondor from Minas Tirith.

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

His name is Estel Telcontar,

He lives where the half-elves are,

That he is dead is just a mortal myth.

He is not prepared to use the ring

He should save his people he is our king

But he doesn't give a damn about Minas Tirith.

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

The Golden woods are wrought with fear

They hold no song I wish to hear

The trees are tall and all around is silence.

The songs they sing are filled with death

The only sound I hear is breath

I wish I were back home in Minas Tirith.

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

The lady spoke inside my head

Told me that my land is dead

But hope lies while the company is true.

I don't see how she can be right,

To win this war, even win this fight,

I'm so afraid for my city: Minas Tirith.

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

The orcs are near, my horn I must blow

And hope Aragorn comes and is not slow

For I cannot hold them off the hobbits much longer.

They want the hobbits, I know not why

I fear that very soon I will die

Faramir must now save Minas Tirith.

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

Minas TirithMinas Tirith

Minas TirithMinas Tirith


	7. Hallelujah: Frodo's Song

Frodo; Through the Marshes (Hallelujah)

We've come this far and now are lost

And we can't sleep for there is frost

I'm sure there's something lurking in the bushes.

I've seen his eyes, I've heard him speak

He's been following us for more than a week

I fear we have to travel through the marshes.

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

Through 'Lorien and Rivendell

We're walking further into hell

We see the Easterlings in the middles of their marches.

Secretly, though I won't say

I'm glad Sam came, it's eased the way.

Our death is soon to come within the marshes.

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

I know he worries much for me,

He makes my lunch, he makes my tea,

He makes it on hill, on rock or mountain.

We journey on and on, no change

We're going in circle it feels like a cage

I can't keep this up, we must go through the marshes.

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

Mordor seems no closer to me,

I wish that Sam and I were free,

Free from the struggle that is laid before us.

It seems that we are lost here now

We need a guide who can show us how

To reach the gate, and help us through the marshes.

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

Gollum is close, I can feel him near,

I don't feel safe with him here,

I'm sure that he will kill us and take his precious.

But if we try to capture him,

And make him swear to help the ring

He could lead is on our way through the marshes.

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

Through the marshesThrough the marshes

Through the marshesThrough the marshes


	8. Hallelujah: Sam's Song

Sam; Frodo Needs Me (Hallelujah)

I heard there was a volcano,

In Mordor, where Frodo must go,

To destroy the ring of Sauron, that he made there.

I must help him in this quest,

I'll be there when it hurts his chest,

Because the pure and simple truth is; Frodo needs me.

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

My heart is good, I can help him through,

The task he bears is my task too,

I'll stick by him until the bitter end.

And if we never make it out,

I'll be there with him to shout,

So he'll never feel that he's alone.

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

I see Mordor looming over me,

I wish our duo was a three,

Companionship is vital at this time.

It's hard to joke about this place,

When we always have to hide our face,

I'm that Frodo didn't come alone.

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

Frodo keeps on falling down,

His face no, always holds a frown,

I fear that he will not last much longer.

And Gollum is not far behind

He's not trustworthy: I'm sure we'll find

Him gone with the ring in the morning.

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

We must go through Shelob's lair

That place is dark: grim not fair

But Gollum insists it is the simplest way.

I hope he's right, but I'm sure he's not,

But the other way we risk getting shot,

But I must be brave and strong for Frodo.

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me

Frodo Needs Me Frodo Needs Me.


	9. Hallelujah: Merry and Pippin's Song

Merry and Pippin; I love Mushrooms (Hallelujah)

****

Pippin: I heard there was a firework,

That Gandalf made in the woods of Mirk,

But nothing can compare to the happy feeling.

It comes at lunch, at brunch and tea,

We have a store just Merry and me,

And the pure and simple truth is I love mushrooms.

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms.

****

Merry: Sausages are nice and tomatoes too,

But nothing compares to mushroom stew,

Bacon tastes good, but mushrooms are even better.

They go with toast, they go with wine,

They don't need feeding like greedy swine,

They're the best things. Yes they are those awesome mushrooms.

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms.

****

Pippin:They're rubbery when they're uncooked,

But they're still the nicest kind of food,

They're always there when I'm feeling down and lonely.

When I'm stealing them I have to hide,

But I can't stop now I won't survive

Cause the best things in Middles Earth are the mushrooms.

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms

I love MushroomsI love Mushrooms.

****

Pippin:Can you imagine if they weren't here,

There'd be nothing left, we'd live in fear,

We'd never taste the joy that they could bring us.

The fairies would have to sit on stones,

There'd be nothing left, we'd be skin 'n' bones,

Our whole lives depend on the mushrooms.

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms.

****

Merry:Oh dear, oh dear I'm very scared,

If the mushrooms die out we're unprepared,

Pippin you must save me from the nightmare.

I can't go on without mushrooms,

Life without them is surely doomed.

I can't survive without those god-sent mushrooms.

I love MushroomsI love Mushrooms

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms.

****

M+P:Aragorn says they're bad for us

But we can tell he's just jealous

Because he keeps on trying to steal them.

He won't succeed they're ours-

****

Pippin:They're mine.

****

Merry:Pippin you must share, let's make some wine.

****

M+P:Mushroom wine…that doesn't sound very divine. BUT…

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms.

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms

I love Mushrooms I love Mushrooms.


	10. Hallelujah: Gimli's Song

Gimli; Flame and Shadow (Hallelujah)

I heard there was a sacred hall,

In Moria beneath the ancient wall,

The one you say 'Mellon' to be admitted.

The walls are lined with Ithildin,

We delved to deep and woke the sin,

And Moria was felled by flame and shadow.

Flame and Shadow Flame and Shadow

Flame and Shadow Flame and Shadow

I see the dead but I need some proof,

That Balin's dead or I will not move,

From Moria the dwelling of my cousins.

They held the gates but the orcs they slew,

The dwarves they died before they flew,

And Khazad-Dum was engulfed by flame and shadow.

Flame and ShadowFlame and Shadow

Flame and ShadowFlame and Shadow

I have never been here before,

I've never crossed the magic door,

But I feel that already I could live here.

It seems so strange and yet so real

I do not know, now, what I feel,

I feel so afraid of flame and shadow.

Flame and ShadowFlame and Shadow

Flame and ShadowFlame and Shadow

The journey to the bridge is nearly down,

And all we hear are the sound of drums,

The orcs they are coming to defeat us.

They're all around there is no way,

We're doomed for sure, no more to say,

I close my eyes, and I see flame and shadow.

Flame and ShadowFlame and Shadow

Flame and ShadowFlame and Shadow

The orcs have fled, now I'm confused,

But something in the darkness moves,

It seems that now ours lives are near ending.

We ran so fast, we crossed the bridge,

But surely Gandalf will not give in,

And no, Gandalf is dead in flame and shadow.

Flame and ShadowFlame and Shadow

Flame and ShadowFlame and Shadow

Flame and ShadowFlame and Shadow

Flame and ShadowFlame and Shadow


	11. Hallelujah: Gandalf's Song

Gandalf; To the Valar (Hallelujah)

I once knew of an ancient way,

That in the depths of Moria lay,

And now it seems that we are forced to take it.

He chose the path, he made the choice,

But my fears I cannot voice,

I must fulfil my duties to the Valar.

To the ValarTo the Valar

To the ValarTo the Valar

I know that I can beat this foe,

I've learned all that there is to know,

The drums are getting louder I can feel it.

We raced across the bridge I won,

But the breaking of the fellowship has begun,

And now I shall be risen by the Valar.

To the ValarTo the Valar

To the ValarTo the Valar

They think I'm dead felled by my foe,

And Frodo's heart is full of woe

From his task, and I have made it harder.

Boromir I fear will fall,

And that will break the Fellowship's wall,

So Frodo must be guided by the Valar.

To the ValarTo the Valar

To the ValarTo the Valar

Aragorn will claim his throne,

The dwarf and elf the earth will roam,

But we must send the dark lord to the void first.

We'll fight the war and maybe win,

We won't be beat, we won't give in,

For the world belongs to no one but the Valar.

To the ValarTo the Valar

To the ValarTo the Valar

The future us unclear to me,

Galadriel's the only one, who can see,

Her mirror holds the truth of how we'll all end.

Frodo will rise to meet his quest,

But to face the pain, must do his best,

And I will, I feel, return to the Valar.

To the ValarTo the Valar

To the ValarTo the Valar

To the ValarTo the Valar

To the ValarTo the Valar


End file.
